Every mom experiences guilt over different things. The thing that gives me the most is when I have to choose between work and my son when he's sick. Every time my son is sick, I am weighing the importance of me being at work versus being home with him. Even typing that sentence fills me with painful guilt but this is the inevitability of being a working mom. Is my son too sick to go to daycare? Is he too sick to be watched by grandparents? Who is going to take the sick day, my husband or myself? And in that regard, who can afford to take a sick day? Who has a concert coming up? Who has an important meeting that day? It is awful for me to feel like I have to ask these questions. I so badly wish I could just drop everything and snuggle with him on the couch at the first sniffle, but that is not my reality. We have such an inner battle with ourselves because obviously our children are the most important aspect of our lives but sometimes, we have to make the painful decision to put our work first. And that type of mom guilt? That guilt is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.
The important thing to bear in mind is that when we finally get a chance to breathe at the end of yet another crazy day and are able to reflect on our successes and shortcomings, we must remember that even if we yelled, even if we fed them pretzels for breakfast and raisins for lunch, or even if we had to go to work when our baby was sick, our kids adore us. The love of our children and our love for them is most significant thing whether or not we are all our best selves all day long. Long term love is more important that short term shortcomings. We are all just doing our best. Moms, we are our own worst critics but in the eyes of our children, we must remember, we are queens.